Routine
by Verboten Byacolate
Summary: She remembered the feel of his lips on hers, the happiness in her soul. It was perfection. And the pain.... The pain she could easily remember. It was right there with her.


A/N; I know, I know; I'm evil. I know I need to write more on my real fics, but... um... well... see... I was listening to this song, that, by the way, I've wanted to write a songfic for for a LONG time, and decided to finally write it. Don't kill me. Don't sue me. Please.

If you do, you'll never know the outcome of any of my other fics! Mwa-ha-ha!!

-Seriously, what is it with me and evil laughter?

Disclaimer; One day I SHALL own a manga, but not today, and not InuYasha. One day I WILL own my own songs, but not today, and not _Little Sparrow_. The two belong to Ms. Rumiko Takahashi and Ms. Dolly Parton.

Hah hah, you two can't sue!!

Okay, getting serious now. If you were, I now command you to stop smiling. If you weren't, well, then, erm... good show. Keep it up. No smiling. This song is sad. This story... might be sad.

Oh, shut up, George. We only pretend to like you, anyway.

... you're just jealous I can write.

... and have a good taste in... real... music.

... Bastard.

**Routine**

She walks by the well every day, unintentionally, at first, but then it became routine. It seemed as though a miniscule therapy, one she wished would really help, but, it didn't. She never got an answer for one of her silent pleas; not that she expected to. Get an answer, that is.

But that really didn't stop her from hoping.

Oh, she hoped a lot these days. As well as pray, cry, and die a little. But it was routine. Just like walking by the well.

_**::All ye maidens hear my warning**_

_**never trust the hearts of men;**_

_**They will crush you like a sparrow,**_

_**leaving you to never mend::**_

Her mother worried for her, and her brother did everything he could to cheer her. The smiles and hugs and affection she returned were weak. They could tell she was dying slowly, surely. They already mourned for her hurt soul. Neither knew why she seemed to be permanently dead to the world. But... they did have a pretty good idea.

It might have had to do with a certain golden-eyed man she loved.

But, of course, they weren't sure of that.

_**::They will vow to always love you;**_

_**swear no love but yours will do.**_

_**Then, they'll leave you for another-**_

_**break your little heart in two::**_

She often sat by the well. Well, to be precise, she leaned against the outside of the well-house and cried. She didn't know if she'd ever be ready to look at the well again.

The portal from her world to his.

The portal... to _him_.

She whispered to herself, oblivious to the world around her, staring into nothing, her eyes clouded over in pain. She never noticed when her family called her inside. She never noticed when the hot days turned warm, and the warm turned crisp. She would lean against the well-house and cry. It was routine, and what she'd do after she walked by the well.

She was drawn to it.

She would die if she could not be beside it.

_**::Little sparrow, little sparrow**_

_**Precious, fragile little thing**_

_**Little sparrow, little sparrow**_

_**Flies so high and feels no pain::**_

The wood on the well-house was worn and dented in places where her nails had accidentally escaped the grooves already worn into it. After a time, seeming to be no time to her, her body had its own fit in the wall. The same place she stood every day. Waiting.

What she waited for, she did not know. She passed the time in tears. She continued to be blind to the world around her. Life meant nothing anymore. Time meant nothing, where it used to mean everything. Every day she waited for nothing. It was routine, like walking by the well.

_**::If I were a little sparrow**_

_**for these mountains I would fly**_

_**I would find him, I would find him**_

_**and look into his lyin' eyes::**_

In the moments against the well, behind her partially blind eyes, in the deep recesses of her mind, she remembered. She remembered the feel of his hand in hers, and hers in his. She remembered every scar on his fingers, every callous, every groove. It was sort of like the well-house walls she fingered.

She remembered the way her body fit his perfectly, every bit, from the way their bodies melded when he held her, to the way her head fit on his shoulder when she leaned against him, to the way she was not the least bit uncomfortable when he rested his head on her lap.

She remembered the feel of his lips on hers, the soft, loving way he kissed her. She'd memorized the small crack on his top lip, the way he gently nipped her bottom lip with his fangs, which had sent a pleasurable tingle up her spine, which she felt again if she thought about it. She remembered the way she felt; how nothing in the world could top the love in her heart, the happiness in her soul. It was perfection.

And the pain... The pain she could easily remember. It was right there with her.

_**::I would flutter all around him**_

_**on my little sparrow wings**_

_**I would ask him, I would ask him**_

_**why he let me love in vain::**_

In the end, he hadn't wanted her. He wanted the first woman; the one he made a promise to, not caring about the promise he made to _her_. Not caring about the promises she made to _him_. Only the prior... only the first...

She sent herself back. She had forced her feet to walk to the well and forced her legs to swing themselves inside. She had forced her lips to say farewell, forced her ears not to listen to the pleading of the young kitsune and demon slayer. She had forced herself to keep her eyes from him as she wished him luck with the other. She had forced herself not to cry as she left their world, forced her heart to stay closed to everybody else, forced herself not to cry in front of them.

She could not force herself to seal the well. It would kill her.

_**::I am not a little sparrow**_

_**I am just a broken dream**_

_**of a cold, false-hearted lover**_

_**and his evil cunning scheme::**_

Only once, in all the time she was living, breathing, and dead to the world, did she almost walk inside the well-house. She felt that the last of her heart was to crumble completely soon, and with its fall, her physical death was to come. She had walked, silently, to the doors of the well-house, and laid her fingers on the slot. Slowly, she let her fingers roam the door-frame. How long had it been since she'd stepped foot inside? It seemed like centuries, and at the same time, like mere hours.

She finally halted her fingers, and placed them in the crack between the doors. She felt them slide apart, but hadn't noticed the force needed to open them.

He was standing there.

They just looked at each other. She, herself, had stopped speaking months ago, and he... he would never tell her how he couldn't even bear to see anyone anymore. How every single being he crossed reminded him of her.

And then, each others' stories flooded their eyes, and they knew... They knew all that was not said.

She knew. She knew he loved her. His eyes told the complete truth, and she could see it even though he was overcome by tears. Without another moment passing, she was in his arms, neither knowing if she had come to him herself, or if he had pulled her to him.

And they wept together.

_**::Little sparrow, little sparrow**_

_**Precious, fragile little thing**_

_**Little sparrow, little sparrow**_

_**Flies so high and feels no pain::**_

She loved him more each day, as well as scold him, embrace him, and kiss him. But it was routine. Just like walking by the well.

-0-

**Yosh! Finally finished!**

**Do you see what I mean?!? I cannot bring myself to keep a fic depressing! I really don't know why! Oh, but you just wait until depression rears its ugly head on me. Oh, yes. THAT'S where the black inspiration seeps in.**

**Anyways, review, peoples! We likes the reviews, we does...**

**Meaning me and my buddy Smeagle/Golem. Yes, his name is Smeagle/Golem, and if you have a problem wih that, you can kiss his wrinkled-**

**-RD**


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